It’s a cracker…
Well, Christmas is past for another year.
We have had a lovely time- we had an extra house guest as a friend had a burst pipe on Christmas eve.
Finally the hold of ice and snow has been loosened- it is raining at the moment, revealing slowly retreating treacherous sheets of wet ice.
Not a day to venture far from the fireside.
So as is my tradition, I think it is time for some bad cracker-type jokes (thanks Isobel for the raw material!)
Firstly for the numbers people-
Apparently the fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was the very well fed Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from consuming too much pi.
Next, for the geographers-
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be
an optical Aleutian
Now for the hardened drinkers-
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
And the non-believers-
Atheism- the non-prophet organization.
For the sporty types-
He wondered why the ball just kept getting bigger. Then it hit him.
And my fellow poets-
Did you hear about the backward poet? He writes inverse.
For the engineers-
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says ‘Dam!’
For the long in the tooth-
Did you hear about the Sadistic Buddhist Dentist? His goal: to transcend dental medication.
And finally- for my fellow canoeists-
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly so they lit a fire in the craft.
Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it.
(Perhaps I should get out more- despite the ice.)