Lent 5…

After a time, the desert seemed so big, and he, so small.

A panic rose in him. It clutched him like a hand at his throat

 

Who am I?

What am I?

What terrible road lies before me?

Father- my body is weak

I am a drop of water

On a rock

Under the hot desert sun

Soon I will be gone.

 

But still he walked- still he followed…

That voice.

 

Lent 4…

As he walked he began to leave something of himself behind. He felt the skin of civilisation being burned away by the sun…

 

Driven away by the wild animals of the wilderness.

 

But with the rhythm of every step there came this incredible music… singing to him

 

It’s your time…. And mine.

 

 

 

Psalm 139 meditation, part 2…

(From Aoradh daily meditations- the first part is here.)

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

I am sometimes invincible

And forget my need for you

Even in the shallow certainty of success

Stay with me father

.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

And when I surely succumb

To the gravity of my human condition

Let the darkness be holy

Let the black become royal purple

And the shadows

Become your open arms

.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

This means that you are never

An accidental father

You have no bastards

No unwanted drains

On your holy resources

.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

Because there is a masterpiece you made

In me

Framed in this shabby shape

Are your majestic brushstrokes

.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Unborn I was known

Unconceived I was expected

There was a space empty

Waiting for the shape of me

.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;

And you became incandescent

With hope

.
23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

Weigh me on scales

Skewed towards grace

For my heart is heavy

With the unshed weight of my world

.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Open me gently

To the new-

To the possibility

Of something deeper

And more beautiful